Welcome to My World

Friday's Ramblings

2011-08-19T11:53:00.000-05:00

Dear Gentle Readers:

If you are anything like me, you have many, many usernames and passwords for the various accounts/sites you visit on the Internet that require a secured log in, i.e., username and password. I just counted mine, and found that I have 65 places on the Internet where I must log in with secured information. These include places like my online banking, stores I shop at online, various email accounts I have, utility companies, pharmacies, my doctor's office so that I can receive lab results, government sites, periodical subscriptions, travel sites, HR stuff at my employment, my ADT account, etc. It's mind-boggling.

Just writing that depresses me. Why, you might ask?

As I get older, my memory is failing me. I know this to be true. At least I have the mental cognition to realize this is happening. Guess that means I do not have any form of dementia. At least, not yet.

I do, however, remember the day when I could remember all that I knew. I could remember all of the piano pieces I'd learned in my entire life, everyones' birthday, anniversaries, death dates, etc. I used to be able to recite all of the teachers I've had since Kindergarten. Yes, even the multiple teachers we all get in MS and HS. I could remember every holiday, birthday, and special event, and where I was and what I did.

This morning I can hardly remember what I had for dinner last night.

There is an upside: TGIF!!! WOO HOO!!!

Days until school is out...

2011-05-26T08:03:00.000-05:00

Days Until School is Out...

2011-05-25T15:34:00.003-05:00

OK. I've been busy, you know, doing my "real" work and haven't had time to sit around writing and posting to my blog (now WHY are clicking here when you are already at my blog? Silly you!). I'm sure everyone has been waiting for me to write SOMEthing/ANYthing.

So here it is. A countdown to the number of days I have left until I AM DONE (stick-a-fork-in-me done) for this school year.

Days until school is out (I missed Day 10, that's how busy I was)...

2011-05-19T09:24:00.000-05:00

Days until school is out...

2011-05-17T15:19:00.000-05:00

Days until school is out...

2011-05-16T09:47:00.001-05:00

Books & Such

2011-05-16T09:28:00.001-05:00

My literary family (Ben & Terry) and friends (Bob T.) often ask me what I’m currently reading. Here’s a sampling of what’s currently on my bookcases. Or, I should say, here are the books I’ve read that are worth mentioning:

The Sister by Poppy Adams

Through the Heart by Kate Morgenroth

The Bookseller of Kabul by Asne Seirstad

Reading Lolita in Tehran by Azar Nafisi

While these are the “best of” books I’ve read so far this year, I’ve also read books on growing and caring for roses, gardening in general, how to grow and harvest herbs, and perused several cookbooks (especially a fabulous Chinese cookbook). These topics have become of interest to me since marrying Teddy, who can make anything grow and has become quite a good cook.

Happy Reading to all you bibliophiles – you know who you are!

Now. What are YOU reading?!?

The Countdown is ON!!!

2011-05-12T08:53:00.000-05:00

...days until school is out!!!

The Countdown is ON!

2011-05-11T09:41:00.001-05:00

...days until school is out!

The Countdown is ON!

2011-05-10T09:10:00.001-05:00

...days until school is out!

There's Always...

2011-05-09T10:19:00.001-05:00

There's always a little truth behind every "Just kidding."

There's always a little knowledge behind every "I don't know."

There's always a little emotion behind every "I don't care."

There's always a little pain behind every "It's okay."

The Countdown is ON!

2011-05-09T09:00:00.000-05:00

...days until school is out!!!

The Countdown is ON!

2011-05-06T09:29:00.001-05:00

...days until school is out!!!

The Countdown is ON!

2011-05-05T13:36:00.001-05:00

...days until school is out!!!

The Garden of Eden

2011-05-02T15:12:00.035-05:00

Dear Gentle Readers:

We have been enjoying our new outdoor living space. Teddy finished the brick paver patio (ca. 260 sq. ft.); we purchased a table and chair set (see photo); and have planted a veggie garden and planted various containers throughout the area. A Garden Bench, built by hubby for my last birthday, now has a trellis surrounding it with the thought of training wisteria to climb it. It's simply lovely. It reminds me of a modern day Garden of Eden. Does that make me Eve? Watch out for The Serpent! Don't eat The Forbidden Fruit!

The Martha Stewart five-piece patio set from Home Depot

Last Friday, taking a personal day of leave, we spent the entire day outside, glorying in the beauty of the day: in the plants now growing in our veggie garden; in the multi-colored plants hanging in the trees; the herb garden; the new patio furniture, on which we have enjoyed many delicious meals; the area for the grill and smoker; the nine rose bushes that make up the Rose Garden; the Wedding Garden, now filled with Celosia (see photo below) for the spring season.

"Celosia is a small genus of edible and ornamental plants in the amaranth family, Amaranthaceae. The generic name is derived from the Greek word κηλος (kelos), meaning "burned," and refers to the flame-like flower heads. Species are commonly known as woolflowers, or, if the flower heads are crested by fasciation, cockscombs." ~ Wikipedia

Now you know! My Celosia are of various colors: pink, orange, red, and yellow, but I seriously doubt we will be eating any of them. They do, however, make a spectacular showing in the 14-foot circular Wedding Garden. Pictures sure to come!

As we were planning our new outdoor living area, we thought we'd place the dining set on the New Patio and leave the chaise lounge chairs on the Old Patio. (I've gotta come up with better names that this!) Several weeks ago, after the patio table/chairs were delivered, I came home and found the furniture fully assembled and sitting on the OP. (How about that? OP for Old Patio and NP for New Patio. It'll have to do for now.) The table was set with two placemats, two linen napkins, and rosebud in a small vase (from my Rose Garden). It looked charming and ready for us to enjoy a meal, which was exactly what we did that evening. My husband, Teddy, is quite the cook and quite the romantic, or had you noticed?!?

We've left the dining set on the OP and have put the two chaise lounge chairs with their side table and firepit on the NP. On a recent trip to Garden Ridge, we bought two additional side chairs and a side table, complementing the original furnishings. Also purchased were two small pillows to enhance the beauty and comfort of the two side charis. All of the items look and work well on the larger NP.

I should, I know, take pictures. Now, where's my camera?

Obsolete

2011-04-21T10:22:00.016-05:00

Bustles...model T cars...manual typewriters...electric typewriters...any kind of typewriter...the list could go on and on.

What do these things have in common? They are all obsolete. According to the American Heritage Dictionary (the online one, not the obsolete print version), the definition of obsolete is

1) no longer in use: an obsolete word.
2) outmoded in design, style, or construction: an obsolete locomotive.

Wikipedia says obsolete means "a service or practice (a person?) that is no longer wanted even though it (she?) may still be in good working order.

Today I am feeling obsolete. Why, you might well ask? I just came from our weekly all-school Chapel. It's Spiritual Impact Week, and it's been a great experience for me, and I hope that's true for the students, too. I've enjoyed the small groups with students and the Prayer Walk yesterday, but today's worship left me feeling... obsolete.

Worship here at my school consists of "praise" songs, most of which I do not know. That's because I attend a church service that utilizes the hymn book (perhaps obsolete, too?) with the music notated (definitely obsolete in praise worship) and the lyrics printed. That's also how I grew up: singing from the hymnal.

I'm not here, per se, to discuss the pros and cons of praise music, just to say that because I do not know or enjoy this type of music, I often feel obsolete. I also feel excluded from worship. This genre of music does nothing to help me feel closer or connected to God. Frankly, I dislike having my senses assaulted while worshipping by the banging of drums and the twanging of guitars. To say that I've seldom heard praise music done well is not an exaggeration; however, ANY kind of music not done well is distracting to me, especially in worship. (Guess you now know I how I feel about praise music, eh?)

Sometimes I am concerned that one day I will not be able to find a church that could be described as "traditional"; that is, one that observes the liturgical year, uses the liturgy, and the hymn books that are in the pews. I enjoy those older hymns, and it saddens me to think that many of our youth will never know the joys of the "Old Rugged Cross", or "How Great Thou Art" (unless it's that jazzed up version, which I do not like, and that has been crammed into a triple meter!). And what about "Holy, Holy, Holy" ? Gotta be one of my all-time favorites: "God in three persons, blessed Trinity." Note with me, please, the sheer poetry in "The Church's One Foundation":

"Yet she (the church) on earth hath union
With God the Three in One,
And mystic sweet communion
With those whose rest is won..."

Eat your heart out, Mr. Shakespeare!

But it saddens me even more to think that I might not be able to sing those hymns of faith in a church building because they (the hymns) are becoming obsolete. Sure, I can sing them myself, but there is something about the body of Christ singing together. Charles & John Wesley knew, didn't they? A good description of what constitutes quality congregational singing can be found in the forward to the United Methodist Hymnal. Dear Wesley brothers, I fear you, too, are obsolete.

In an episode of "The Twilight Zone" entitled "The Obsolete Man", a librarian (convincingly portrayed by Burgess Meredith) is found to be obsolete due to the fact that books are banned in that society and literacy is considered obsolete. His punishment? Death. Now this is a little scary, too, because not only am I a musician, but also a librarian. In an plot twist enviable of O'Henry, the ending deliciously satisfies those of us who also might be considered obsolete.

Etiquette...literature...literacy...writing...music...note-reading...hymn books...books themselves (alas! the Kindle!)...Obsolete? If so, then I, too, have become obsolete.

Found a Peanut, Found a Peanut

2011-03-17T13:36:00.005-05:00

The Peanut I found is a two-year old, fawn and white colored female Chihuahua. If all goes well, she will soon become Domino's little sister. We have been talking about adding another member to our family, and feel that this may be a good opportunity to get another little Chihuahua.

We also thought that getting a female might be a better idea than acquiring another male. Perhaps Domino will more easily accept a female and would feel less territorial. On the other hand, he may have her for a snack one day! On the other hand...now wait. I only have two hands!

Who knows how he will react? We do know he "does not play well with others", but living with and assimilating another animal into The Pack might work. We don't want to stress Domino, but we are eager to give another Chihuahua a good home. And Domino sure has it good in our home!

We really won't be able to do anything toward receiving Peanut into our home because of our Spring Break plans. But as soon as we get home, we will look into The Peanut Matter.

The Mustard Seed

2011-03-02T14:29:00.005-06:00

Yesterday afternoon after work, Teddy and I sat on our "old" patio enjoying the warm sunshine on the first day of March. Suddenly I said, "Let's play in the dirt!" So we got out our herb seeds and those little plantable cardboard "cups" and planted our berbs: dill, cilantro, oregano, lavender, and sage along with some cherry tomatoes that are best started in those little containers (I am learning a lot on the Garden Trail!).

Wow. Have you ever planted herbs?!? The seeds are tiny...smaller than mice droppings (how I know THAT is for another post) and you only need about 5 seeds per little pot. (No, we're not growing "a little pot"! Heh, heh...but I digress...) As we planted, we talked about the tiny seeds, and Teddy reminded me of the scripture concerning the mustard seed (Matthew 17:20) where Jesus said:

"If ye have faith as a grain of mustard seed, ye shall say unto this mountain, 'Remove hence to yonder place; and it shall remove; and nothing shall be impossible unto you.'"

Seeing how tiny the seeds were and thinking about my faith (or lack of it?) was pretty humbling.

As we planted, all I could think about was how blessed we are...how grateful I am...and wondering what will come up in those 26 little pots!

The Firepit

2011-03-01T10:54:00.012-06:00

Hubby and I are transforming our rather blah backyard into a peaceful and beautiful oasis from the world. Our efforts include planting a spring veggie garden (cherry tomatoes, peas, green beans, scallions, winter squash, and zucchini); an herb garden (basil, lavender, chamomile, oregano, cilantro, and a few more that I can't remember); and eventually we'll plant lots of flowers for color. We already have five metal windchimes, and recently added a large wooden one.

Other plans include a brick patio, dining furniture for four, and a firepit. While we've yet to buy the furniture, we did buy a firepit on Sunday evening from Home Depot. And since we bought it in-store, there is no online picture of it, but I've selected a close facsimile for your viewing. It's square like this one, with a grille top, and has gray/dark orange tilework around the perimeter. The tile color is similar to the brick color we've chosen for the patio. Ours also has a handle on top (be careful! it gets hot when there's fire in the pit!)

Yesterday was, to understate the matter, a challenging one in Library Land, and all I could think about was getting home and out for some PT with a margarita or fine glass of wine (or even NOT SO FINE) with my boys and enjoying the flames of the firepit.

Hubby called at lunch and I told him about my morning. I said, "All I want to do is sit by my firepit and drink when I get home." And being the Best Husband in the World, he had the firepit assembled with a log in place and ready to light!

After a delicious dinner, which he also cooked for us, we sat in companionable silence on the patio and watched the flames dance in the darkening light.
It was really beautiful. Too few people can enjoy solitude or the companionable silence with a loved one. But we consider it a joy to be able to do so, not feeling the need to fill the air with noise and chatter, but rather savoring the moments of peace and quiet while just being...together...

The Rings Come Full Cirlce

2011-02-21T08:54:00.008-06:00

The story of our courtship began in February of 1974, which was my Junior year of high school, when, faciliated somewhat by my younger sister, Teddy and I attended the Valentine Banquet our church was hosting. We continued dating through the spring and summer of 1974, up until the time Teddy received the news that he was being transferred to Anchorage, Alaksa. I still remember the night -- sitting with him in his Delta 88 in the parking lot of the Dairy Queen in Killeen on what is now the Business 190 -- when he told me about his orders.

Unbeknownst to me, the two-ring, white gold bridal set had been purchased in July or August of 1974, prior to his move to Alaska. They stayed in Clarendon while he was in Alaska, but he brought them with him when he came to see me in July of 1975 with the intent of asking me to marry him. I had just graduated from high school, and he was spending the week in my home under the watchful eyes of my parents. The week he was back in Killeen was wonderful and we enjoyed resuming our relationship.

But marriage was not to be at that time. At 17 years of age, I needed to go to college. Teddy needed to go to college -- we both knew that, so he didn't propose and I never saw the rings. When he left Killeen in July of 1975, and the last time I would see him until December of 2009, he took the two rings back to Clarendon and put them aside.

Over the years, he moved around quite a bit and the rings in the box with other memorabilia went with him. At some point, he lost track of where they were. Last week on his trip to Clarendon to fetch some needed items, he was talking with his brother, Terry, and the topic of the rings came up.

"Oh, yeah, I saw those rings in a box when I was rummaging around in the shop a few months ago and brought them up to my house," Terry reported. How they had gotten in the shop, Teddy said, was beyond him. More than likely, his dad, now deceased almost 4 years, had been digging around in the garage, found them, and must have put them in the shop. "In the shop!" was his horrified response. Teddy couldn't figure out either why his dad would have put wedding rings in the shop. Nevertheless, there they were. From Clarendon to Killeen and back to Clarendon; from Clarendon to all the many little panhandle towns in which Teddy had lived over the years; and then a final return to Clarendon when he moved to care for his dad in 2003; from garage to shop to Terry's house, the rings had certainly made it around!

Last Friday evening, just as we were about to leave the house for our weekly date, Teddy said, "Sit down." Having NO CLUE as to what he had on his mind, I sat (as the obedient, good wife that you all know I am!). Then he got down on one knee (what?!?), reached in his back pocket (now I was really puzzled!), took out a green box that looked like a ring box because that's exactly what it was (I was finally getting the idea!), and said, "Belinda Kaye King Scholl, will you marry me?" and produced the two rings he had bought for me in 1974.

Still shiny and pristine, all I could do was stare in disbelief at the beautiful set of rings that were meant for me over 35 years ago. I had wondered and had even asked Teddy about a year ago where the rings had ended up. He told me that he had saved them over the years; that they were meant for me, so he never sold or gave them away. I couldn't believe he had really kept them for all these years. Surely he had sold them. Surely he had done something with them. Surely. But, no. When we were at the Clarendon house in June of last year, we looked for the rings, but did not find them. But on his recent trip, with the help of his brother, he had found my rings. My rings.

What will I do with the rings? Well, we went to a jewelers on Saturday and I'm having them sized and sautered together. While they are more simple than what I currently wear, they are beautiful and the story behind them precious and sweet. I plan to wear them alternately with the ring Teddy gave me in February of 2010. The picture in this blog is not of the actual rings, but is very similar. The actual rings have a Florentine pattern on them, but otherwise, they are a two-piece white gold bridal set of a simple diamond solitaire and matching band.

My answer to Teddy's proposal? "Yes, over and over and over again!!!"

The Pack of Three (Minus One)

2011-02-17T13:39:00.003-06:00

Our Pack has diminished. One of our members is gone, albeit temporarily. Domino and I have been left to fend for ourselves tonight while Teddy drives back to Clarendon (near Amarillo) to fetch his wookworking tools, table saws, and all of the other mysterious thingies that a woodworker uses to turn a chunk of wood into a piece of art or a utilitarian product, of which we have both examples in our backyard.

He called to say he'd arrived safely -- always a relief to my hyper-active imagination. Though he will be back tomorrow early evening, I miss him even now while at work. But Domino and I will keep the home fires burning and will manage on our own until the other 1/3 of The Pack returns safely to our loving arms and paws!

Texas Means Spring in February...Sometimes

2011-02-15T10:23:00.011-06:00

After an extended hiatus from blogging, I'm back in FULL FORCE. There's a lot going on in the Scholl-Ashcraft household, so sit back with the beverage of your choice, and read on about the happenings of our little family.

After several weeks of some pretty severe weather (at least for North Central Texas), we are now experiencing the reason we love and live in Texas: springtime in February.

"For lo the winter is past"...and the promise of spring is alive deep in our hearts. This according to the Gospel of Belinda Scholl.

Yesterday, the temperature in Fort Worth was a high of 71. After getting home and into comfy clothes, my hubby and I sat on the patio, enjoying our "cocktail hour" (sipping tea and wine, respectively), catching up on the day's events, and basking in the late afternoon sun on our faces. Domino, our six-year old Chihuahua, scampered about the yard, reveling in the apparent new smells that the winter weather had left behind. Boy, was he happy to be outside with Mama and Daddy! Our Pack of Three was all home and together. It doesn't get much better than that for a Chihuahua -- unless he is munching on a bite of sausage biscuit that Daddy has over-indulgently given him.

Hubby and I gazed on our recent endeavor: that of our small garden plot. Over the past weekend we tilled the soil and hammered the nails into the wooden framework that will soon hold the bounty of our work: six crops we've chosen to grow this spring -- green beans, peas, winter squash, zucchini, green onions, and cherry tomotoes. Along the raised perimenter of the garden plot we also plan to grow some herbs in terra cotta pots. The thought of "living off the land" has me feeling a bit like Mother Earth. The picture below, while not of our garden, is remarkedly similar. We have a wooden framework much like this one.

When the garden is prepped for planting, we will start the second part of The Backyard Project: that of extending our concrete patio into the yard using bricks. The new patio will be around 260 square feet and will be used for alfresco dining, a sitting area, and a pad for the grill and smoker. Once completed, we'll be able to pass the food from grill/smoker to the table. Eating out-of-doors always makes the food taste better.

Don't you agree?!?

Until next time...

Days Until School is Out...

2010-06-01T11:52:00.001-05:00

Dear Gentle Readers:

The day has arrived! That being, the last day of school! Technically, it's not a school day, but a "work day".

Whatever.

I bid you all a wonderful summer. This Blogger will be in and out, so there won't be a lot of new posts this summer.

Thanks for stopping by.

Library Lady

Days Until School is Out...

2010-05-28T14:11:00.003-05:00

Dear Gentle Readers,

OK. So I've missed a few days of posting the number of Days Until School is Out...but you don't wonder why if you know anything about the end of the school year.

Anyway, I am definitely in the final stretch. Tuesday, June 1, is a teacher "work day" -- making it sound like we teachers/librarians don't work any other time than a designated "work day".

SHEESH.

Anyway, to my colleagues far and wide who are already finished with their school year, I salute you, and wish you blessings on your summer.

Library Lady

Days Until School is Out...

2010-05-24T08:32:00.001-05:00

School Daze

2010-05-20T12:13:00.004-05:00

Dear Gentle Readers:

Yesterday was so busy ("How busy was it?") that I didn't get to post my "Days Until School is Out" number, which would have been 9. And that number was SO PRETTY. So I give it to you anyway.

Days Until School is Out...

2010-05-20T12:11:00.001-05:00

Days Until School is Out...

2010-05-18T14:01:00.000-05:00

Days Until School is Out...

2010-05-17T12:48:00.002-05:00

Days Until School is Out...

2010-05-14T12:22:00.003-05:00

Days Until School is Out...

2010-05-12T14:18:00.003-05:00

Days Until School is Out...

2010-05-11T09:56:00.003-05:00

Days Until School is Out...

2010-05-07T11:57:00.004-05:00

In Memory of Blackie

2010-05-06T12:37:00.006-05:00

Dear Gentle Readers:

I witnessed something this morning on my way to work that no one should have to ever see: the death of a beautiful, large, black, male dog (maybe part Lab?) that was hit by a truck driving in the opposite direction from me.

Sycamore School Road, one of the main thoroughfares I travel to and from work each day, is a treacherous one. People speed, dart in and out of lanes, turn with no signals, and generally drive like bats out of hell. As for me, I know there is always CRAP out there when I drive. I expect CRAP. I am watching for CRAP.

And so it was this morning I encountered CRAP. Looking ahead as I drove (you know, from driver's ed, "getting the big picture"?), I saw a pretty doggie trotting along on the right side of the road on the sidewalk. He was on the bridge that spans the little creek near the park. About 1/4 mile from our house.

Why. oh why did he decide to cross the road at that exact Moment in Time? I was able to slow down and give him some space as he crossed the road. I looked to my left to see if the doggie made it across, but a truck (an older maroon pick-up truck) hit the beautiful dog with the front left tire.

I saw this. I even heard it. I think I FELT it.

And I was devastated. Looking in my rear view mirrow, I saw the black dog lying there in the middle of the road on his side. Turning around in the park that was nearby, I went back to check on him. He was still living! Grabbing my cell phone, I dialed 911 and asked for Animal Control to come and help. In the meantime, numerous cars drove by slowly (I was blocking a lane of traffic each direction, determined that the sweet dog would not be hit again), but no one stopped. Finally, one man stopped to try and help, but didn't know what to do, and was running late to work, so I thanked him for his kindness in stopping, and said goodbye.

A few minutes later, a young, pretty, heavily tatooed woman stopped. She said, "I'm a vet tech. Let me take a look." With no hesitation, she stooped down to check on the dog. She gently felt him, said he was warm, but there was no pulse. He had died while I was standing there with him in the middle of the effing road, waiting for help. But at least I had petted him several times, and I was there as he drew his last breaths. I hope to GOD there was not much pain. I can't even go there...

I found a pristine, white linen tablecloth in my trunk and gave it to Stacy, the vet tech, in which to wrap up Blackie, my fond name for the beautiful doggie that had just died as I watched over him, and helped her put him in her hatchback. She said she'd take care of him. As she laid him down, Blackie's bright red blood stained the white cloth, just as it had on the street where he had so violently died. I was glad that Blackie had something so nice in which to be swaddled. Little did I know the cloth's intended use until this morning, as I had been carrying it around for years.

While awaiting help, I'd called my husband, Teddy, to come and be with me -- and maybe to help with Blackie. But Blackie had been taken away by the time Teddy got there. Leaving the scene of the tragedy, we drove our respective vehicles to the nearby park where we held tightly to each other, crying together over the loss of the sweet, innocent dog named Blackie.

Teddy loves animals as much as I do -- especially dogs -- and we share and live with a lovable, sweet, precious but precocious, adorable, five-pound, long-haired, black and white male Chihuahua aptly named Domino. He is the Love and Light of our lives.

I asked Teddy to go home and love all over Domino; to hold him close; to carefully watch over him. Of course Teddy does this everyday, but the thought of Domino in the road, on our street...well, I just can't go there.

To all you dog lovers and owners: watch out for your beloved pets. Don't let them run loose. Keep tags on your pet, and get him/her micro-chipped so that if he/she gets out, you will be notified. Stacy said they would check to see if Blackie had been chipped. By the way, we had Domino chipped in March at his yearly Well Dog visit.

This has, of course and understandly, upset me tremendously today. It is a reminder of the uncertainty and fragility of life. As if I needed to be reminded...

So, Gentle Readers, go home tonight and love, hug, and kiss your spouse/children/pets. We never know how long they will be with us. Blackie is gone from us for good. Let's not let his life go unredeemed.

Days Until School is Out...

2010-05-06T11:41:00.003-05:00

Days Until School is Out...

2010-05-05T14:33:00.004-05:00

The Countdown is ON!

2010-05-04T13:09:00.010-05:00

Dear Gentle Readers:

It is official. It has begun.

We are in The Final Days.

No, I'm not talking about Armageddon, but it may be just as bloody. I'm talking about The Final Days of School. Where I work, there are exactly 19 days including today because I WANT CREDIT FOR GETTING UP THIS MORNING!!!

OK. In order for you to celebrate with me, I'm in the Countdown Mode. Here are the number of days that remain in the school year. That's work days for me.

Stay tuned!

Significant & Formative Events in My Life

2010-04-08T10:42:00.007-05:00

I like what my sister-in-law, Sarah, has done with one of her blog entries; that is, creating a chronological listing of what she calls "formative experiences" in her life. I wrote one of these for my life and posted it in 2008, but it's not current and needs some updating. So here goes:

1957 Being born. Without this step, there would be no significant -- or otherwise -- events in my life.

1977 Meeting Tim, my husband-to-be, at Southwestern University

1979 Graduation from Southwestern University (Bachelor of Music in Piano Performance)

1980 My marriage to Tim

1981 Moving to Rochester, NY for Tim to attend graduate school. Some very difficult and unhappy years for me.

1985 Moving back to Texas for me to attend graduate school (TCU)

1987 Graduation from Texas Christian University (Master of Music in Piano Pedagogy)

1988 My Dad dies at the age of 61

1989 Buying our first home and still living there

1992 Graduation from UNT (Master of Science in Library & Information Sciences)

1993 My Mom dies at the age of 55

1997 Starting first school library job

1999 Tim is diagnosed with Hodgkin’s Lymphoma

2004 Last vacation with Tim to San Francisco (what fun!)

2005 Tim dies of Hodgkin’s Lymphoma after a struggle of 5 years

2007 Taking an Alaskan cruise with friend, Sandy, a trip of a lifetime!

2007 My sister being diagnosed with breast cancer

2007 Taking an interim job as a church pianist

2007 Becoming a pet Mommy to Domino

2007 Taking the interim job as pianist as a permanent position

2008 Joining this church as a member

2009 In late December, reconnecting with my high school sweetheart, Teddy, with a visit from him during the New Year's holiday

2010 Falling in love again with Teddy and marrying him on March 15

2010 Living very happily with Teddy in Fort Worth

Everything's Comin' Up Roses

2010-04-01T09:15:00.011-05:00

Dear Gentle Readers:

As a wedding gift, and knowing how much I love and enjoy flowers, my newly wedded husband, Teddy, decided he would plant a special garden for me in our backyard. After a trip to Home Depot last Sunday after worship, and several hundred$ of dollar$ later, we came home with petunias, marigolds, 9 rose bushes, other assorted "spring color spot" plants, border, veggie seeds for our veggie garden (a work in progress) that include spinach, squash, orka, and two tomato plants. And finally, 5 bags of mulch. (Mulch is the "secret" to a thriving garden, so don't neglect this step of the planting process. Trust me on this one.)

And he got right to work. Over the course of three and one-half days, he has dug up the ugly Hawthornes that lined the back portion of the house (the sunny, west side), and replaced them with roses in a variety of colors and heights: red (2), pink (2), yellow (4) and iceberg white (1). "Stunning" is the word I'd use to describe the result. The picture at the top of this post is of yellow Lady Banks, the name of the rose he bought for me. It is a minature, climbing rose.

The Wedding Garden has an attractive white Adirondack border around the perimeter of the garden in which he placed our birdbath in the center (after cleaning it out -- YUCK!!!), then planted fragrant yellow and orange marigolds. They are spectacular and can easily be seen as I sit in the recliner in our bedroom.

Lastly, he planted pink petunias in the front yard (in two separate areas of the beds) and used some of the left over marigolds for three pots he placed in the Angel Garden, also located in the front beds. On the patio in the back yard, he planted 5 containers of -- I forget the exact name, but they are tiny pink flowers with "lacy" green foliage. Using some more left over marigolds, he made three hanging baskets that now adorn our large Red Oak tree in the back yard. Every single flower he bought was used in a beautiful manner.

Our plans are to sit on the patio -- weather permitting -- and enjoy the fruits of his labor. We also have five assorted wind chimes that provide a melodic accompaniment to our evenings on our patio. We call it our PT, or Patio Time.

Domino has loved "working" with Teddy in the gardens as well as sitting on the patio in the evenings with us. Domino sits with one of us while alertly surveying his area of responsibility! There we are, the happy little family, with Teddy drinking his iced tea, and me sipping my crisp glass of Chardonnay.

Life is good. Life is very good...and it's comin' up roses...or mostly roses...

Wedding Bells

2010-03-31T12:11:00.002-05:00

Dear Gentle Readers:

As you read this blog posting, I will be a married woman! Yes, Teddy and I decided to move up our wedding from June 26, 2010 to March 15, 2010. We were married March 15 at 12:30 p.m. in a double ring ceremony at Christ United Methodist Church in Fort Worth where we are both members, and where I serve at the Traditional Service as the pianist. My sister, Terry, her husband, and one of her children joined us in the quiet, but worshipful, ceremony that Pastor Vaughn performed. His lovely wife, Jacque, was also present for the occasion.

After the ceremony, we took our limo (!) to Reata where Teddy and I hosted members of "the wedding party" for a wedding luncheon.

There were several notable reasons we chose an earlier date, among them wanting to avoid the stress related to planning even a small wedding -- and I was beginning to really feel that stress. We decided Spring Break would be a great time to get married, giving me the week off from work for our honeymoon. We kept it "under the radar" except for a few close family members.

We know many of you had planned on attending The Great Event of 2010, i.e., our June wedding, and hope you will forgive us for forging ahead with our plans. Now you are free to do something else! Thank you for your love, support, and well wishes as we now are husband and wife.

By the way, I am retaining my last name of Scholl.

Blessings,
Teddy Ashcraft & Belinda Scholl & Domino Scholl

A Ring of Truth

2010-03-02T15:30:00.008-06:00

Dear Gentle Readers:

I recently did some piano judging for a local music association. I judge for different events about 3-4 times a year, and as such, many of my piano friends do not know about my upcoming wedding plans.

With me so far? OK.

One of these judges is a woman -- let's call her Mary which is a good generic name, and it also happens to BE her name (let us not protect the guilty!) -- that I've known for years and years as a professional colleague in the Piano World. She had known Tim in the Piano World. At the time Tim knew her, she had been married, but was since divorced, and now remarried to an older, and obviously wealthy man (as you will learn from the story).

As some of the women judges were admiring my ring and asking about my upcoming wedding plans, Mary remarked to me, "Your ring is beautiful. I wish I'd gotten a smaller diamond like yours. Mine is such a burden to wear. I'm always worrying it will get stolen, or I'll lose it, or damage it. I should have gotten something more sensible like yours. My husband paid $27,000 for this set and it just worries me something awful. You know, the larger the center stone, the more valuable the set."

Oh, really?!? Well. What. could. I. say. to. that? ? ? ? ?

All I said was, "Well, mine is insured so if something happens, it would be sad, but at least we could replace it." Readers, my ring is not really all that "sensible". It's certainly not ostentatious, but it is a full two carats, with the center stone weighing in at 1.10. The diamonds are all F in color (nearly colorless), etc. It's a fine ring.

What I SHOULD have said was, "All that money wasted on a ring that you wear on those liver-spotted hands of yours! Ouch!!! Bet your husband's sorry to have paid all that money to adorn those claws of yours."

What do you think of THAT?!?

People.

"A Lenten Musical Offering"

2010-02-17T05:23:00.004-06:00

Dear Gentle Readers:

I will be a part of a piano-vocal concert with Anita McNew, Music Director of Christ United Methodist Church, on Sunday, February 21, 2010, at 6:00 p.m. We will each be presenting 4-5 pieces that are of a contemplative and introspective nature as we enter the season of Lent.

A couple of my selections will include Pachelbel’s “Canon in D”, the first movement of Beethoven’s “Moonlight” sonata, and an assortment of hymns entitled “Cornerstone Medley”. A sampling of Anita’s performance includes Schubert’s “Ave Maria” as well the hauntingly beautiful “Via Dolorosa”.

We cordially invite you to attend this concert as you prepare your heart for the upcoming Holy Season.

The concert is free and open to the public, and a reception immediately follows. The church is located at 3301 Sycamore School Road, near the intersection of McCart and Sycamore School Road – just across the street from Rosa ’s and Wal-Mart. The phone number is 817.346.2400. Additionally, please visit our website at http://www.cumcfw.com.

If you are unable to attend and would enjoy having a CD of the concert, they will be available in a week or two after the concert. The suggested donation for the CD is $10.00. All proceeds will benefit the Chancel Choir of CUMC.

We hope to see you Sunday evening.

Blessings,
Belinda Scholl

“The holiness we seek does not consist of human perfection
or strength of will, but God's grace.”

~ Bruce Yocum

Scholl Piano Music Online

2010-02-10T11:11:00.005-06:00

Dear Gentle Readers:

As many of you already know, I serve as my church's pianist at the Traditional Worship Service. My offertories are now on the church's website. If you want to hear some of the selections, go to

http://www.cumcfw.com

Then click on "Online Sermons" on the left sidebar.

Choose a date, then click on "Music". We are beginning to add titles/composers.

January 24 is "As the Deer", a Belinda Scholl arrangement of the popular contemporary piece.
January 31 is very blurry, and does not do justice to the music or to me. It's a medley of "Holy, Holy" and "How Majestic is Your Name", another Belinda arrangement.
February 7 has title/composer.

I'd love your feedback. What I do is first for God, secondly for others, and thirdly for myself.

Enjoy!

"The Perfect Engagement Ring"

2010-01-20T15:27:00.009-06:00

TA DA!!!

And here it is in all its glory, vibrance, and splendor ~ the ring that we believe symbolizes our love for each other.

Our thanks to Luxury Collections NY for their exceptional service, courtesy, and professionalism as we made our purchase through them. A special "thanks" to Alex for shipping the ring more quickly than was first requested.

Family and friends have described it as beautiful, spectacular, stunning, fabulous, BIG, and magnificent. It is all these things and more! Thank you, Teddy, for giving me this lovely ring and for the love that it represents.

A Modest Proposal: Dreams, Signs, and Visions

2010-01-20T14:21:00.012-06:00

Dear Gentle Readers:

There were several factors I considered as I made my decision concerning the marriage proposal made to me recently.

Let me start by saying that I believe in dreams, signs, and visions. The dream you already have read about (if not, please read the prior blog and you'll understand); one sign came from the lyrics to one of the pieces from Prince of Egypt -- "Through Heaven's Eyes". Music has the power to speak to me, and I often find answers in what I hear. The words to this powerful piece of music did just that -- it spoke to me and gave confirmation as I said "yes" to his question.

"...and though you never know all the steps,
you must learn to join the dance..."

speaks of the leap of faith one must take -- dare I say "risk" that is involved in the loving and blending of two separate lives.

"If a man lose ev'rything he owns
Has he truly lost his worth?
Or is it the beginning
Of a new and brighter birth?"

Teddy told me that at one point in his life he felt he'd lost everything: his job, his marriage, his chance for happiness. Still, he had not lost his worth, and we believe God is now providing both of us "a new and brighter birth".

The vision is what we see as our future life together. It's beautiful -- filled with love, mutual caring and respect, and the simple daily sharing of life's events.

For your consideration, I offer the words to the song, "Through Heaven's Eyes".

A single thread in a tapestry
Through its color brightly shine
Can never see its purpose
In the pattern of the grand design

And the stone that sits on the very top
Of the mountain's mighty face
Does it think it's more important
Than the stones that form the base?

So how can you see what your life is worth
Or where your value lies?
You can never see through the eyes of man
You must look at your life

Look at your life through heaven's eyes
Lai-la-lai...

A lake of gold in the desert sand
Is less than a cool fresh spring
And to one lost sheep, a shepherd boy
Is greater than the richest king
If a man lose ev'rything he owns
Has he truly lost his worth?
Or is it the beginning
Of a new and brighter birth?

So how do you measure the worth of a man
In wealth or strength or size?
In how much he gained or how much he gave?
The answer will come
The answer will come to him who tries
To look at his life through heaven's eyes

And that's why we share all we have with you
Though there's little to be found
When all you've got is nothing
There's a lot to go around

No life can escape being blown about
By the winds of change and chance
And though you never know all the steps
You must learn to join the dance
You must learn to join the dance
Lai-la-lai...

So how do you judge what a man is worth
By what he builds or buys?
You can never see with your eyes on earth
Look through heaven's eyes
Look at your life
Look at your life
Look at your life through heaven's eyes

~ Music and lyrics by Stephen Schwartz

And now, the rest of the story...

2010-01-12T13:25:00.002-06:00

Dear Gentle Readers:

I've had several questions about the short story "The Christmas Interloper", and now I'd like to answer them for you.

The story is non-fiction. "Emma" is, indeed, Belinda (me!), and it happens to have a very happy ending. For both your reading enjoyment and entertainment, I provide for you "the rest of the story"...taken from an email recently sent to family and friends of the bride-to-be.

Happy Reading!

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

Dear Family & Friends,

As I sit writing this email, I am also planning my wedding which will take place on June 26, 2010. Yes, it has all happened rather unexpectedly and suddenly. While we plan for a new life together, we also have established a time of reflection, prayer, and courtship so that we may confirm that this is the right path for our respective and joint lives at this time.

I am actually marrying my high school sweetheart. Teddy Ashcraft and I met and dated when I was 16 and he was 20. He was in the military at that time and we met at the Baptist church we both attended in Killeen, Texas. Being a mere 16 years old, my parents had to "inspect and approve" of him dating their young daughter. But he passed the Alice and B.T. test, and we dated for about a year -- as I remember it. During my senior year, he was transferred to Alaska and I subsequently graduated from high school. While he wanted to marry me at that time, I told him I needed to go to college, and so I did.

As Paul Harvey says, "the rest of the story" you already know. I met and married my college sweetheart, Tim. We were happily married for almost 25 years when cancer struck and took his life. Next month, in fact, will be the 5-year anniversary of his death. That doesn't seem possible, but time has a way of marching on -- with or without you.

Just prior to the Christmas holidays, I had a dream about Teddy. He and I were in my parents' living room. We were all sitting there talking. Mom and Dad looked healthy and happy -- probably the best part of the dream. Then all of a sudden, they were gone and I was left alone. A feeling of uneasiness came upon me. I was, in fact, quite frightened. Remembering Teddy was somewhere close, I called out for him and he came to me. Somehow, I felt better after that. But the dream stopped and I awoke.

The next morning was Saturday, and not having much else to do, I did some online research. I found him! I knew he'd been married, but was not certain of his current marital status. Further research revealed an obituary of his Dad's that did not mention a wife for Teddy as one of the survivors. It did list his brother and HIS wife as survivors. Aren't I quite clever?!? More research, a phone number, a possible address...and I called him that evening after much debate on the propriety of the act. Since that time I've been assured that the rules have changed and that women may call men. After all, this is the second decade of the 21st century. I left dating and dating protocol in the late 1970s, so who would have known?

In a fast-forward moment, we talked on that Saturday night and on subsequent occasions for hours at a time. It was fun catching up on a lifetime that happened over 36 years ago. I discovered he'd been divorced after a marriage of 13 years that can only be described as quite unhappy. There were no children from that marriage -- a definite plus in the marital consideration process.

We agreed that he'd come for New Year's Eve and we'd go to dinner. Indeed, he came, we went out, we fell in love (again!) that week, and by the end of the time we'd spent together, he asked me to marry him. Since I've completed all the college I want or need, and after much thought and prayer, I said "yes".

Teddy lives in Clarendon, an hour southeast of Amarillo. He has a brother there, but other than that, there is no other family. Since he is somewhat retired and I need to continue working, he will move here and live in Fort Worth with me. He has attended my church and likes it. He plans on attending, and perhaps joining. Domino, my little Chihuahua, adores him. I have to remind Domino that he is MY dog, but he has taken a great liking to Teddy. I've learned that dogs are a good judge of character. For professional reasons, and the fact that I've been Belinda Scholl for almost 30 years, I will retain my married name. It's a hassle to do all the necessary paperwork that involves changing one's name. We want simple at this time in our lives and keeping my name fits with that philosophy.

The wedding itself will also be simple. There will be no formal invitations, so just come. It will be held at Christ United Methodist Church at 3301 Sycamore School Road, Fort worth, 76123 in southwest Fort Worth on June 26. The phone number is 817.346.2400. The exact time has yet to be decided, but I will keep you posted. This is where I'm a member and have been serving as pianist since September of 2007. After the brief ceremony, we'll have a simple reception to greet our guests, and then be off on our new life together. We hope you will be able to come!

In conclusion, I will say that I never expected this to happen. I really wasn't "looking" or hoping for anything in particular when I called Teddy. It was more or less of a whim. I almost didn't call him! I also never expected to have another husband -- especially one who would love me so unreservedly and whole-heartedly. I never dared to ask God for that since I'd already had such a marriage. To have found such favor with God that He has given me -- truly, given us -- another opportunity for marriage is more than I could have ever conceived.

We ask you to share in our joy and happiness and that you support us with your good thoughts & prayers. We also hope to see you June 26 in Fort Worth, but if that is not possible, we know you will be us in spirit and love.

More later...

Teddy & Belinda

"A Christmas Interloper"

2009-12-17T15:26:00.011-06:00

How many years had it been? Well over thirty by Emma’s own account. Many life events had occurred in that period of time ~ years of college, graduate and post-graduate study; the eventual Ph.D; the beginning and establishment of a long and successful career; love found, love lost; love found again; marriage; and in recent years, the death of a beloved spouse. Yet, all along the way, much happiness and laughter, albeit sprinkled with times of adversity and sorrow. All in all, however, a very good life. One might even say a rich, full, and rewarding life.

But thirty years!?! What would he say? Better question, what would she say? Even with these and many other thoughts whirling around in her mind, she decided to do it. This time she listened with her heart, and not necessarily her head. This time.

After about an hour of research on the Internet, Emma found an address and a phone number that seemed likely. She mentally went over her short introductory speech that included several “what ifs”: What if he hung up on her? What if he cursed her? (After all, he had a right to do so.) Worst of all, what if he didn’t remember her? While these scenarios played out in her overactive imagination, what she really thought was, “Who cares? I’m going to call him.”

It was Saturday night around 7:30 p.m. As she dialed the unfamiliar long distance number, she was thinking, “He’ll probably be out. Or he may be at home with his wife. I wonder if he’s still married?” If so, the conversation would be very brief, as she assured herself, “I’m not going THERE!”

“Hello?” The voice was low and soft, as if the person had just woken up from sleep or a long nap.

“Hello. This is Emma. Emma Carson. (Silence.) You may remember me as Emma Long.”

It took a few seconds, but the recognition was there. And then …

They talked and talked – for well over an hour. It was a comfortable, easy talk. Just questions about life, work, the usual things. “Do you remember…?” “Whatever happened to …?” It was fun playing “catch up” for a while.

No, he was no longer married. (WHEW!) Divorced. Apparently the wife had been a “piece”. Emma shared a bit concerning the loss of her husband. They each talked of some health issues. Their very conversation seemed to breathe an air of mutual sympathy and caring.

After hanging up, she felt she’d done the right thing. Just checking up on an old friend. Well, maybe slightly more than an “old friend”, but that’s what it felt like: a visit with an old friend.

The next day was church. As Emma listened to the pastor, he talked about the service they’d have on Christmas Eve. He asked the congregants to consider inviting someone to church who might not otherwise have a place to worship. Emma immediately thought of him. But calling again? So soon?

“Wanna go to the school dance with me? Huh? Huh? Pretty please?!?”

NO!

Way too junior high school-ish.

YIKES! Double YIKES!! Triple YIKES!!!

Being a very resourceful woman, she did the next best thing: she wrote one of her highly articulate letters. A concisely conceived, yet warm and inviting letter explaining about the service and asking if he’d like to attend.

“I’m writing this to give you more time to think about
what I want to ask you. I thought about asking in
a phone conversation, but felt that might be awkward.
No expectations, no pressure. Just one nice, good,
friendly person asking another nice, good, friendly
person to a worship service.”

After mailing it, she thought about how all this might seem to him. After all, it had been over thirty years. Would he consider her to be an interloper into his life? While the phone conversation had gone well – each expressing enjoyment of it – inviting him for a visit was quite a different thing than picking up the phone for a chat.

At this point, all she could do was to wait for his response. Sooner hopefully than later, Emma would discover if she were a Christmas Interloper. With fingers crossed, she hoped that, if so, she would at least be a welcomed one. After all...this is the Season of Miracles.

December: Blessings to You & Yours

2009-12-09T12:03:00.010-06:00

Dear Gentle Readers:

This entry actually comes from the Domino Calendar I created in 2008 to give as Christmas gifts. The calendar was wildly successful, and so I share the December 2008 page with you at this time.

Christmas is for most people a time of being together with family and friends; the sharing of special meals; the observance of familiar traditions; and perhaps a time for the exchanging of gifts. It will be no different for Domino and me as we make our travel plans to be with family members. My sister’s dressing somehow is imprinted on my taste buds and I can hardly wait for the delectable feast she conjures up at the holiday time.

It is also at this time of year that our thoughts turn to the blessings in our lives. I would like to share some of mine at this time and I encourage you to do the same. As the old saying goes, “Get rich quickly. Count your blessings!”

A Moment of Wonder: I share with you my blessings – knowing each of you are a part of those blessings.

2009 has been "A Year of Blessings"

God’s providence in my life
(enough food, clothing, transportation, and adequate housing)
Family, Friends
Domino
A job that is rewarding and challenging
Good health and adequate health care
A church home and family whereby I may worship and fellowship

Domino and I wish you a very
Merry Christmas and a very Happy New Year!

Meditate on: Family & Friends
Scripture: Philippians 1:3
“I thank my God for every remembrance of you.”

Sister & Nephew Time

2009-12-07T10:07:00.018-06:00

This past weekend, my sister and her youngest offspring came for a visit. If you follow my blog, you'll know that Terry and Matthew were the first family Domino had. Naturally, my sister and Matthew were eager to visit Domino, and Domino wriggled in excitement when I told him who was coming to visit!

It was a joyous reunion -- Domino's paws hardly touched the ground the entire time they were here. Extra arms to love and hold that precious pup! And he gobbled up all that attention. Note Domino wedged in my arms and huddled up to stay warm! What a pup!

My sister and I had some very good quality "sister time". Thanks, Terry, for your help in acquiring my new MYTHIC PHONE I am, indeed, loving it! But mostly I love the time we spent together.

Great hugs, Matt! Great stories, Terry!

What's said at OTB stays at OTB!

~ Photos courtesy of Terry Lee Knight

A Season of Gratitude

2009-11-20T13:10:00.033-06:00

I'm going to dedicate this blog entry to things/people for which I am grateful. Happy Thanksgiving!

Things for Which I am Grateful

in No Particular Order

a sister's love

the ability to learn

good books to read

friends with strong shoulders to lean upon

a warm home and food on my table

Domino, my beloved Chihuahua

"Gratitude is when memory is stored

in the heart and not in the mind."

~ Sam Hampton

To Your Health!

2009-11-03T13:37:00.015-06:00

Important Women's Health Issue:

Do you have feelings of inadequacy?

Do you suffer from shyness?

Do you sometimes wish you were more assertive?

If you answered yes to any of these questions, ask your doctor or pharmacist about Margaritas.

*Margaritas are the safe, natural way to feel better and more confident about yourself and your actions.

*Margaritas can help ease you out of your shyness and let you tell the world that you're ready and willing to do just about anything.

*You will notice the benefits of Margaritas almost immediately and with a regimen of regular doses you can overcome any obstacles that prevent you from living the life you want to live.

*Shyness and awkwardness will be a thing of the past and you will discover many talents you never knew you had.

*Stop hiding and start living with Margaritas. Margaritas may not be right for everyone.

*Women who are pregnant or nursing should not use Margaritas.

*However, women who wouldn't mind nursing or becoming pregnant are encouraged to try it.

Side effects may include:

Nausea

Dizziness

Vomiting

Incarceration

Erotic lustfulness

Loss of motor control

Loss of clothing

Loss of money

Loss of virginity

Table dancing

Headache

Dehydration

Dry mouth

And possibly a desire to sing Karaoke

WARNINGS:

*The consumption of Margaritas may make you think you are whispering when you are not.
*The consumption of Margaritas may cause you to tell your friends over and over again that you love them.

*The consumption of Margaritas may cause you to think you can sing.

*The consumption of Margaritas may make you think you can logically converse with members of the opposite sex without spitting.

Please share this with other women who may need Margaritas.

Thank you.

Thank You

2009-10-24T10:23:00.004-05:00

Domino depends on me for everything: food, water, shelter, and health care. Everything he receives comes from me. I believe that because I have committed to having Domino, I must see to the very best of his welfare. In the book of Genesis, we are instructed to have "dominion" over the animals. To me, this means we are to be good stewards of and for the animals. This includes little Domino! Rest assured, he receives only the very best from me!

While Domino cannot speak words of thanks, I receive gestures of thanks in the form of a loving, affectionate animal -- and more often with licks of love and gratitude. Oh, yes! It's very clear to me that Domino is expressing gratitude.

Likewise, everything I have, everything I will ever have, comes from God. I depend on Him for everything I need, and He faithfully supplies my every need. Rest assured, I receive only the very best from Him!

A Moment of Wonder

Although I do not take for granted the life I have, I admit I am occasionally remiss for not giving enough thanks to God. I am good at asking for things, but am I as good at returning thanks? He takes care of all my needs, and provides for me on a daily basis. May I be more mindful of the blessings He has bestowed upon me.

Meditate on: Gratitude

Scripture: Psalm 92:1

"It is a good thing to give thanks unto the LORD."

A Morning in the Life of a School Librarian...

2009-10-23T10:33:00.012-05:00

OK.

TGIF, and all that stuff. But that doesn't stop the insanity from invading my work world -- the world of being a school librarian. It does help, however, to know it will end at 4:00 p.m. this afternoon. Then I will celebrate TGIF. At the closest Happy Hour bar I can find.

I report to work every morning around 7:25 a.m. My start time is 7:30 a.m., but I use that 5 minutes to get ready for the day: turn on the laminating machine, put the three newspapers on the shelf, and boot up the OPAC. Then I sit down and log on to my PC -- which is a misnomer, because, for sure, there is NOTHING personal about it. But that's another blog...

OK.

From 8:30 a.m. to 10:30 a.m. on this day in history, I have had these questions -- or requests -- asked/made of me. And I am NOT making up any of it, either. After all, I AM an information specialist. My master's degree in science in library and information sciences (36 hours of coursework) helps me to be able to answer these questions.

* Do you have a glue stick?

* I need a pair of scissors. (Not even phrased as an interrogative.)

* Do you have any poster board? (I am beginning to pick up on the fact that a class project is due TODAY!)

* Would you like to help sell water for the Sophomore class? It's a fundraising activity.

* The photocopier is jammed.

* The corollary to the above: The photocopier is out of paper.

* Where is the Lost & Found? (Yes, the Library has the privilege of sponsoring the L&F, which is not always just books, backpacks, and textbooks -- IF you know what I mean...)

* Has anyone turned in a history book? (See above question.)

* Where does the Homecoming Dance start tomorrow night? (At least it's an information-based question.)

* What time is it? (#$&$#!&% !!!)

* A corollary to the above questions: What time does this period end?
(My answer to this is always: "The same time it ended yesterday, the day before, and every other day this school year." The student then just states at me, surely thinking, "Ms. Scholl has gone nuts. She needs a man in her life. "

* Has Mrs. Garcia left my Spanish test up here for me to take?

* Ms. Scholl, I know this is not Library-related, but do you have change for a $10.00 bill? (At least the patron was honest in that it was not, indeed, a Library-related question. Also, the student does not realize what librarians earn, and therefore do not even carry bills in that large of a denomination.)

* Have you seen _______? (Fill in the blank with name for any of our 470 students and/or 50 faculty/staff.)

* When do report cards come out? (I don't even DO report cards.)

* When will Mrs. Neill be back? (She is the college counselor who offices in the corner office of the Library. I am also her "receptionist" since my area is the first thing you see when you enter the Library.)

* Ms. Scholl? Would you please wipe my behind?

These questions were seriously asked this morning in a two-hour period while I was trying to do REAL library work. (big sigh) OK. OK. Maybe not the last question, but only because students seldom use the word "please" for their whiny questions.

Oh, for a truly library-related question such as, "In which database could I find information on _______?" (Fill in the blank with any academic/intellectual topic of your choice.)

A la Glen Campbell..."Oh, such as the dreams of the every day Librarian..."

Certain Things...

2009-10-20T09:47:00.009-05:00

There are certain things I can no longer do. Let me rephrase that. There are things I no longer want to do. Some of these things include listening to certain pieces of music, going to certain places, and being with certain people.

Allow me to explain.

I married my college sweetheart in May of 1980. We met at Southwestern University where we were both music majors and, as such, had many classes in common. We studied music literature, music history, and music theory together. We even took a piano ensemble class together and frequently played four-handed music together. One such piece was a Brahms Hungarian Dance.

Music
Listening, as I often do, to WRR Classical 101.1, this morning I heard that same Brahms piece. In a “flash back” moment, I was abruptly snatched from the present, and hurled back in time when Tim and I played this composition in that piano class. Then, almost as suddenly, I was in a “fast forward moment”, remembering when we reprised that same piece for a concert we were doing together – many years since first learning the music in that piano ensemble class.

The memory was fresh – as if it were yesterday. As lovely as the piece was then and is now, I slammed my hand against the on-off button of the radio and drove the rest of the way to work in silence.

Places
This year – 2009 – marks my 30th reunion from Southwestern. I have several friends who graduated with me. Though Tim did not graduate that year (he was a year behind me in school), he was an inseparable, woven-into-the-very-fabric-of-my-body part of my time at SU. The thought, however, of going back without him is unthinkable, unspeakable, and undoable to me. There are too many tender memories in the buildings, the halls, in the nooks and crannies of the Fine Arts Building, in the campus itself for me to be able to go back without tears. Not only would the memories of us as students haunt me, but also of the times we attended other reunions (our 10th), and of the times we drove through campus -- making that slight detour off of I-35 – as we drove down the interstate. It’s too sensitive. It’s too fragile. I won’t be attending my 30th reunion.

People
During our life together, we met and made many friends – lifetime friends – or so I thought. But when death comes, it doesn’t just take your beloved. It can also take or change other relationships. Suddenly you go from a couple to a single. The dynamics in relationships change. One such relationship has succumbed to this fate.

While I am happy for this couple, for their togetherness, and the fact that they have a strong and vital marriage, because there are so many memories of us/them, it’s somewhat painful to be with them. I know they sense it, too, but we’ve never spoken of it aloud. It’s too sensitive. It’s too fragile. The relationship is not exactly lost, but it has changed, altered, shifted. In short, there’s a big hole. That hole is Tim.

In a loftier and truer sense, however, the relationship IS lost. You can never have exactly what you had before; therefore it is lost.

“Time stops for no man,” is true, especially in the grieving process. Death comes. You grieve – hopefully in a healthy way and you “get better”, whatever that means – but when you finally drag your head up from your grief, time has marched along and you are several years, maybe more, behind everyone else. Some things have changed. You no longer look at the things the same. You can’t. Music, places, people are different and you must start to redefine yourself by your current set of circumstances.

It takes time. It’s not fun to have to “re-compose” one's self. It’s hard. It’s painful. It’s scary. It’s lonely. Yet, it starts to happen. Slowly, maybe. Or perhaps in larger spurts. But it does come – if you’re lucky, if you have enough prayers said on your behalf, if the planets all line up, and if the stars are in your favor.

Birthday Wishes

2009-10-19T13:57:00.006-05:00

The Birthday Fairy has just informed me that I have three wishes for my birthday. Here's what I am wishing...

1. Peace on earth

2. A cure for all kinds of cancer (does that count for more than one wish?!?)

3. Jesus at my breakfast/lunch/dinner table

What are your Birthday Wishes?

Birthday Month

2009-10-19T13:28:00.007-05:00

"Happy birthday to me, happy birthday to me..."

Yes, this is my birth month. October 26, to be exact. I'll be 52 a week from today. I was asked by a co-worker today how I would celebrate it. Actually, I've not thought of anything yet. It's not like it's a "special number". The special number was two years. On my 50th birthday, I was playing for the funeral of a dear friend's mother. Doesn't seem possible that Miss Norma has been gone two years...

Tim's birthday was last Wednesday, October 14. He, too, would have been 52. A friend knew this to be Tim's birthday and asked me, "How are you going to handle it?"

"Same as I've handled it for five years." But it seems to be different every year -- the feeling of loss. That feeling ebbs and flows -- just as life does. Another friend simply emailed me on Tim's birthday and wrote six words: "With sweet thoughts of Tim today...". Very meaningful. Thank you, Brenda.

It's not that I'm against celebrating, I just don't think I want to do anything very special. Besides, it falls on a Monday, and I'm not usually up for anything "big" on a work night. At my age and stage of life, if I want anything, I will have to arrange it. Seems like too much work.

Actually, what I'd like to do is to plant pansies in my garden. Miniature pansies. The purple and yellow variety. Pansies are the "flower of thoughtful reflection". What a lovely thought. I like the idea of planting pansies in October and thoughtfully remembering my friends who also have birthdays in October -- and indeed, all of my friends. Maybe Saturday would be a good day for that...

To all my October Birthday Buddies: Mom, Tim (who are now both deceased), Sarah, Sandy, Ben Scholl, Ben C., my friends at work, James, Mary Beth, Ryan, Grant, Sherri, and Sharon ~ ~ ~ "Birthday Blessings!"

A Naming Contest

2009-05-20T08:23:00.003-05:00

Dear Gentle Readers ~

I’ve recently cleaned out my husband’s “office” at home and plan on renovating it for my own purposes. The room will have a treadmill, a chair-sleeper (it folds down into a twin bed), and a lamp for reading. For years, the room was called “Tim’s Room”, or “Tim’s Office”. Since Tim’s death, I’ve called it “that room”, with somewhat of a sneer in my voice! Shall we just say he left it piled high and wide with lots of stuff.

Now that I am re-designing the room, I’d like a name for it. And that’s what leads me to YOU: a group of highly intelligent and creative people. I am soliciting names for “that room”. I’ve given you the purpose of the room and what will be placed in it. Please don’t suggest “Guest Room” because I already have one of those! And I already have a “Home Office”. I’m looking for something catchy/creative/novel/different.

The contest will work this way: please provide me your suggestions, and the one I use will win a prize – a gift card for $25.00 to Barnes & Noble. You may submit more than one name.

I thought a contest would be fun and would provide me with a lot of naming possibilities. And someone would win a card!

So please email, or post, your suggestions by Sunday, May 31, which would have been our 29th wedding anniversary! I will look over the submissions, choose one, and let you know of the winning name on Monday, June 1.

Thanks for your help. Have fun!

Heart 2 Heart

2009-04-24T14:16:00.017-05:00

Last night I received a phone call from the brother of one of my dearest friends, Sandy. He was calling to tell me that my friend – his sister – was in a local hospital with heart failure. My friend is 8 days older than I. I am 51.

From the of age two, we lived next door to each and for the next sixteen years were cohorts in both the good and evil schemes which we planned and implemented. She was with me during Tim's last three days of life, and helped me to get him into hospice right before he died. She has been there for me through all of life's major events. And vice versa. Sandy is a major persona in my life.

Upon calling Sandy, I learned that her doctors thought her condition might be due to one of these conditions, or perhaps a combination of these conditions:

1. a blockage in her arteries
2. a virus/bacteria left over from a recent URI had traveled to her heart
3. a vitamin/mineral deficiency due to gastric by-pass surgery performed some years ago

Sandy had an angiogram this morning and the results were good: no blockage. At this time, her doctors will treat her for numbers 2 and 3. If she improves, she will go home Saturday. This is an answer to prayer – and a quick one, too.

My friend is in a very high-level position with a school district in Texas. She is also working on her Ph.D and stays busy in both areas. Perhaps too busy. I’ve often asked Sandy what she does for fun. Her answer is always the same, “Nothing. I work and study.” All work and no play make Jane a dull girl, and maybe a sick girl, too.

While talking with her, I lovingly suggested the following to her:

“Sandy, while making a living, don’t forget to also make a life.”

She said those were wise words and that she would think about it.

In our busy world, I think we could all use this piece of advice. I know we all have to work to support ourselves, our children, perhaps our elderly parents. Somehow, however, we must learn how to balance our lives.

Make no mistake about it, stress -- from whatever cause -- can and will kill. Stress may take you out swiftly with a sudden and unexpected heart attack, or it may cause a dread disease that will gradually suck the life out of you. Then you die.

In recent years, I have learned to say “no” to things. That was a hard lesson to learn, but it pleases me to be able to say I've become pretty good at it. Through that lesson of life, I find that I have a greater level of joy for the things to which I do say “yes”, and appreciate having more time for my friends, my family, and myself.

To my busy family and friends: just think about it. There is more to life than work. Seek balance. Practice balance. Learn to say “no”.

Just do it. Your heart will thank you.

Random Stories: Short Vignettes on Recent Life Happenings

2009-03-30T13:36:00.010-05:00

Miracle on Sycamore School Road

Every so often, a month has a fifth Sunday in it. On such Sundays, my church has a potluck luncheon as an opportunity for us to feast and fellowship together as God’s children. Yesterday was one of those Sundays. After partaking of the delicious bounty of food that had been spread before us, the congregation had the chance to participate in a Silent and a live Auction.

There were about 15 items up for grab in the Silent Auction, including a Pamper Yourself white wicker basket containing various bath products and a lovely lavender scented candle. Although I had donated the item, I thought about bidding on it! Other items were a soup supper; a bling-bling pearl and silver necklace; several CDs of contemporary Christian music; and some religious wall hangings.

The main attraction, however, was the Live auction, in which a beautiful, hand-made quilt had been generously donated by one of our church members. (I would say “church lady”, but that has SNL connotations that are not all that complimentary!). I had my heart set on getting this quilt, and making it a gift to my sister, and figured I could go as high as $500.00. Surely that would be enough to win me the coveted quilt!

The bidding began at $50.00, but quickly escalated and eventually narrowed to an older church member and me. I left her in the dust at about $490, and figured the quilt was mine! But NO! All of sudden there was another bidder against me! It was a friend, Christa, who sings in our church choir. Having told her prior to the auction that I wanted the quilt for my sister, I was somewhat surprised to see her actually bidding against me! Looking back on it, I now remember seeing her I-know-something-you-don’t-know smile – meaning, she was up to something! Little did I know what!

Bidding had reached a fevered pitch. The congregation would gasp as increments of ten dollars were bantered between the two of us. Christa and I haggled and haggled until her bid reached $590. It was a lot of fun, but I had to stop. With only $500.00 to bid on the quilt, I was insane to continue bidding. I’d be selling plasma for the next year, but it would be worth it. Yet – I stopped. I gave Christa a big hug and congratulated her on the win. It was a wonderful feeling to know that we had raised so much money that would be used for children and youth ministries.

I watched as Christa wrote out her check, folded the beloved quilt, and laid it in the very chair I’d been sitting in and said, “It’s yours.”

“You’re kidding!”

“No, I knew you wanted it for your sister, and now she can have it.”

After several (admittedly and ashamedly feeble) attempts to resist her kind and thoughtful offer, I humbly accepted the quilt and gave my friend another big hug. I was almost in tears as I thought about what had just happened and how my sister would feel hearing the story and receiving the beautiful quilt.

Later that same afternoon, I met my sister in West, Texas (along I-35 south of Hillsboro) in order for her to take my beloved Chihuahua, Domino, for the week. It was then that I related the Miracle on Sycamore School Road (the location of my church), and presented her with the quilt.

It was a moment of shared love and joy for two sisters. My thanks to Cindy for creating such a beautiful quilt, and to Christa who so lovingly gave of herself so that my sister could have the cherished quilt.

DISCLAIMER: The picture at the top of this posting is not of the actual quilt. I just found a heart quilt and inserted it. As soon as my sister gets me a picture of the real quilt, I will add it to this posting.

The Golden Hour

Some of my gentle readers may have heard about the Golden Hour. From a medical standpoint, this refers to the critical time that trauma victims have to get the much-needed medical attention for their injuries. In other words; the sooner, the better. Wikipedia has this to say on the topic:

“The golden hour, from an emergency medicine perspective, is the period of time that occurs within a few minutes to several hours following injury. It is well established that the victim's chances of survival are greatest if they receive care within a short period of time after a severe injury. The ‘golden hour’ is not a rigidly defined time frame. Rather it is the core principle of rapid intervention in trauma cases.”

Saturday morning, I helped to proctor entrance exams for prospective students of my school. I administered exams for Advanced 9th grade students. As an aside, there were 52 math (problem solving) questions. I could answer about 4 of them. YIKES!!! Remember: this was a 9th grade level exam. But I digress from the point of my story…

What does proctoring exams have to do with the Golden Hour principle? Usually I arrive at my desk in the Library around 7:20 a.m. each morning. This means I rise at 6:00 a.m. each workday morning. Since we were to be in our testing rooms by 8:30 a.m., I arose at 7:00 a.m. that Saturday.

Thus, the Golden Hour of this story refers to the extra hour of sleep I got on this Saturday morning. I couldn’t believe the difference that it makes – rising at 6:00 a.m. versus 7:00 a.m.

Oh! The testing went well, and I look forward to the “little something extra” in my next paycheck. Sure beats selling plasma.

A Dance Lesson: Then and Now

2009-03-09T11:50:00.014-05:00

The young women were beautiful and the young men handsome. While some came “drag”, most of the young people came “stag”. All were well-dressed, well-groomed, and well-behaved. To what am I referring?

I was asked to help chaperone the High School dance at my school last Saturday night. Originally scheduled as a Valentine’s Dance – but due to a conflict on the original date – the dance had been rescheduled and subsequently re-named a Mardi Gras Dance – though well past the date of Fat Tuesday. I suppose just calling it "A Dance" would have been lame.

I arrived fashionably on-time – meaning, the time I’d been asked to arrive – at 7:00 p.m. Even though there were a few students milling around, the Gym was mostly vacant. Things began to pick up, however, around 7:20 p.m., and by 7:30 p.m., things were in full swing.

As many of you already know, Margaret Mead was an American cultural anthropologist who was frequently a featured writer and speaker in the mass media throughout the 1960s and 1970s. Note, please that the 1970s were the coming of age years for this writer.

People watching has long been one of my favorite pastimes – although I rarely have the time to indulge this small delight. Chaperoning this high school dance gave me nearly three hours to “play” at being Margaret Mead; that is, observing young Homo sapiens in their native habitat, engaging in their courtship rituals.

I noticed a number of things at that 2009 dance that were quite different from a 1970’s dance. In no particular order, here is what I observed:

1970s Girls’ Dress
Long, floor-length dresses, often referred to as “a formal”
Modest apparel that left something to the imagination
Shoes, though perhaps excruciatingly uncomfortable, were worn at all times

2009 Girls’ Dress
Short dresses were the norm; a few girls had knee-length dresses (which I found more attractive on them than some of the skimpier ensembles)
Lots of strapless/backless dresses – some I personally would consider somewhat immodest
Outrageously high-heeled shoes which were discarded upon arrival into what looked like a Shoe Mosh Pit – “dancing” took place bare-footed

1970s/2009 Boys’ Dress
Not really much of a difference – I suppose the pendulum has swung around far enough that 70’s clothing really is making a come back. Even the boy’s hairstyle of today reflects that of the 1970s: longish and casual in nature

1970s Dancing
Exclusive boy/girl dancing with “real” dance moves
Dancing usually reserved for “the one that brung you”
(I never would have considered dancing with someone who was not my date –
and I always had a date!)
Those not dancing were not on the dance floor were seated at tables or were standing and talking

2009 Dancing
“Dancing” could be defined as standing on the dance floor while talking and gently swaying with your partner, or in various combinations of boys and girls
Some, though not much, exclusive boy/girl dancing
Girls dragging boys by the hand to the dance floor where the “dancing” was performed
Girls dancing with other girls in groups of 3 or more
Boys huddling together talking with hardly any “swaying”
Large groups of boys and girls just standing on the dance floor talking

1970s Transportation
We usually arrived in a car with our date
Sometimes, two couples would share a ride

2009 Transportation
Young people, though usually it’s their parents (or their parents’ money) will rent a limo for the evening to chauffer a group of the young dancers to and fro’

There were, of course, other differences, but these were the ones that were most striking to me. Not intended as a criticism to the youth of today, my intent is only to compare. Having last attended a dance (and a college dance, at that) in 1979, I realize that like most other things, change happens: trends change; style changes; traditions change; in general, times change.

Still, it was a fascinating look at Today’s Teenager. One thing, however, remains the same for teens of all generations: for all their outward glamour and pseudo-sophistication, they are normal teens doing what normal teens do – getting together with friends for a good time.

And I’m glad to say, everyone did have a good time (the chaperone included) while also exemplifying good judgment, character, and propriety. Who could ask more of a teen from any generation?

February Devotional

2009-02-13T14:46:00.002-06:00

February
“Unconditional Love”

There are many things I’ve learned about dogs since acquiring Domino. One of them is their amazing ability to give unconditional love. I may be tired – not in the mood to play or do much with Domino, but he always shows his love for me. He does this with doggie love licks, his adoring eyes, and the wagging of his big, bushy black tail. There is no doubt in my mind of his love for me. Interestingly, he is usually the first one to show the love, and I follow along after his example. Even when I’m tired, Domino’s love for me revitalizes me and fills my heart with such wondrous love.

God was very smart to create dogs.

A moment of wonder: I should never forget the unconditional love the Father shows for me day-by-day, hour-by-hour, and even minute-by-minute. He provided the supreme sacrifice by the giving of his Son so that I may experience eternal life. Now that is love!

Meditate on: LOVE

Scripture: I Corinthians 13:13
“And three things remain…love, hope, and faith…and the greatest of these is love…”

Words of Wisdom

2009-02-11T12:37:00.016-06:00

Dear Gentle Readers:

I have been a long-time fan of George Carlin (May 12, 1937 – June 22, 2008). My husband, Tim, and I saw Carlin twice in Vegas. Shortly before Carlin's death, I saw his performance at Bass Hall (March of 2008). While some of his routines can be "bawdy", here are some genuine pearls of wisdom from a man who, in my opinion, had a very keen insight into human nature, and was not afraid to call it as he saw it. Thanks, George, for the memories.

We have more degrees, but less sense; more knowledge, but less judgment; more experts, yet more problems; more medicine, but less wellness.
We drink too much, smoke too much, spend too recklessly, laugh too little, drive too fast, get too angry, stay up too late, get up too tired, read too little, watch TV too much, and pray too seldom.
We have multiplied out possessions, but reduced our values.
We talk too much, love too seldom, and hate too often.
We've learned how to make a living, but not a life.
We've been all the way to the moon and back, but have trouble crossing the street to meet a new neighbor.
We conquered outer space, but not inner space.
We write more, but learn less.
We plan more, but accomplish less.
We've learned to rush, but not to wait.
We build more computers to hold more information, to produce more copies than ever, but we communicate less and less.
These are the days of two incomes, but more divorce; fancier houses, but broken homes.
These are days of quick trips, disposable diapers, throw-away morality,one night stands, overweight bodies, and pills that do everything from cheer, to quiet, to kill.
Remember, say a kind word to someone who looks up to you in awe, because that little person soon will grow up and leave your side.
Remember, spend some time with your loved ones, because they are not going to be around forever.
Remember to give a warm hug to the one next to you because that is the only treasure you can give with your heart and it doesn't cost a cent.
Remember to say, "I love you" to your loved ones, but most of all mean it. A kiss and an embrace will mend hurt when it comes from deep inside of you.
Remember to hold hands and cherish the moment for someday that person will not be there again. Give time to love, give time to speak, and give time to share the precious thoughts in your mind.

Spring in Haiku

2009-02-11T10:51:00.004-06:00

I realize that it is still officially winter, but spring is right around the corner. With that in mind, and to welcome and usher in the new season, I offer this haiku for my readers' enjoyment.

Buds burst forth with joy
in new-found rays of sunshine
Spring has come once more

Birds feast at feeder
water at nearby birdbath
Beauty of nature

Flowers in spring dress
revel in splendid color
Nourishes the soul

Pristine sky of blue
spring in her skirt of green grass
summer is patient.

A Christmas Tree Adventure

2008-12-12T12:48:00.016-06:00

Thursday, December 4:
After deciding that I’d buy and set up a Christmas tree this year – I thought Domino, as an only child, really NEEDED a tree – I set about to research where I could get one at a really good price (think CHEAP), that would not look cheesy and would be the right size in proportion to the area in which it would be installed.

My Library Assistant actually found me a tree online at Home Depot. It was perfect: a 4 ½ foot, Jackson Spruce, pre-lit with 250 clear lights. OK! I was getting in the Christmas spirit. I ordered it from work last Thursday, December 4. Got the email confirmation later that evening from HD that my order was “in process”. I was good to go and feelin’ the spirit of the season!

Friday, December 5: Alas! On Friday evening I got another email from HD saying my order had been cancelled. No reason was given, but I did call the toll-free number to find out what had happened. The representative could not tell me why, but did offer to re-order the tree for me. OK. Christmas spirit suddenly snatched up with in email, but re-gained with the second order all in a matter of minutes.

Wednesday, December 10: Another email from HD. The order had been cancelled AGAIN. Calling HD once more, a better-informed representative told me the tree was out of stock, and that no more would be coming in. The Grinch had stolen my tree!!!

My Christmas spirit was in the crapper. The search for The Tree seemed bleak. It looked like Domino would not have his tree. My assistant, less deterred than I, looked on the Internet and found a similar tree at Lowe’s. It was a 4 ½ foot, Deluxe Aspen with 200 pre-lit clear lights. (The Grinch had stolen 50 lights off this tree; however, I would still get a tree!) But guess where it was?!? In west Dallas, just off I-30 at Cockerell Hill Rd. At best a 45-minute drive in rush hour traffic.

OK. I thought, “I can drive there and back in 90 minutes, giving 5 minutes in the store to purchase the tree, and get back for dinner at my church by 6:00 p.m.” Followed, I might add, with our 7:00 p.m. dress rehearsal for our choir cantata. Picking up Domino right after getting home from school and with him riding shotgun, we made somewhat of a mad dash up I-35 to I-30, hooked a right toward Dallas, put the pedal to the metal, and got out there on the road with all the other crazies during the beginning of rush hour.

When I got to the Lowe’s, there was my tree. Sitting behind the register in the Garden Center. Just as had been promised to me. A nice employee even put the tree in my trunk, and in just under 5 minutes I was on the freeway headed back to Fort Worth. Mission accomplished!

We got back home just a few minutes before 6:00 p.m., and after getting Domino settled, I left for church and the evening’s activities.

As I think back on this adventure, I’m not sure why I got so desperate for a tree. I think it’s because once I’d decided to get a tree, I was going to get a tree. Nothing more, but certainly nothing less. Upon this tree hinged a lot of my Christmas spirit. While I know Christmas is not about trees – or gifts, or parties, or lights, or any other of the many “trappings” of the holiday season – I wanted one to help me celebrate this special time of year. I assembled and put it up late this evening.

Saturday, December 13: Today I will decorate our tree with angel ornaments that I’ve collected over the years. Domino will have his tree this year.

Merry Christmas to you & yours.

May the true gifts of this season be yours

now and throughout the New Year:

Hope, Love, Joy, & Peace

"Hitting the Jackpot: a Christmas Story of 2006"

2008-11-18T14:47:00.007-06:00

Prologue:

This true story was written a few days after a service project that was performed by faculty and students of the school at which I work. Although the event occurred two years ago, truly the theme is timeless as well as universal. I hope you enjoy the story.

*****************************************************

The private, Christian school where I work had undertaken a most worthy Christmas service project. After purchasing backpacks/duffel bags, etc., students had filled the packs with items that the homeless might need: wooly mittens, warm hats, canned food, bottled water, blankets, etc. The plan was to deliver these packs to these poor unfortunates just prior to Christmas Day. It was a wonderful, heart-warming gesture, and one in which I wanted to participate.

The appointed day for our delivery was Friday morning, December 22, the very first morning of our Christmas holidays. As I woke that morning around 7:00 a.m., I was keenly aware of my surroundings: a warm house, a cozy bed, security in my environment, and knowledge that a breakfast of any kind of my choosing awaited me in my fully stocked kitchen. While I did not feel guilty for having these things, I did feel a tremendous sense of gratitude for my situation, and knew I was blessed beyond what I really needed to exist -- having much that enhanced my life beyond my needs, and in fact, to many of my wants. As I dressed and ate, I continued to experience this sense of gratitude for all that God had given me. And I prayed that God would bless those we served as we worked as Christ's servants.

Our group met at school quite early to pack up our gifts and trek to where the homeless lived -- if that's not an oxymoron. Where DO the homeless live? I was about to find out. We circled up on the parking lot of the Middle School Building, and while holding hands, Kory, one of our faculty, led us in prayer for our mission. There were four vehicles filled to the brim with these gift-laden backpacks.

I was traveling with one of our parents and her daughter; another student from school; and Kory. The back of the huge suburban-type vehicle in which I was riding was chock full of backpacks as well as our good intentions of serving the homeless.

And off we went! While I had been in the "homeless area" of town, having visited the Presbyterian Night Shelter (PNS) numerous times -- and also that of the Women's Haven -- encountering the homeless at that particular level was not an unknown to me. But I was wondering how this particular event would impact me. While I had no fear, coming face-to-face with the homeless was not something to which I was accustomed. It’s easy enough to make sandwiches, then leave only to have those sandwiches served long after I’m gone. It’s another to come into contact close enough as to be able to give a Christmas greeting and shake hands.

As we were driving toward the designated area, the parent who had gone on such a service project before explained how the event would work: we would drive to known areas where the homeless stayed, get out, open up the hatches of our vehicles, and pass out the Christmas bags. I remarked that perhaps many of the homeless had taken refuge at the PNS since the temperatures had been at or below freezing that previous night. Knowing that many sought this shelter in the worst of weather, I didn't really think we'd find many of the homeless out and about at 8:30 a.m. in the morning. Little did I know what was to come. Very little, indeed.

And, in fact, it did take us several tries before we actually found a few of the homeless. We had driven around vacant lots, through "neighborhoods" one could hardly call a neighborhood, and finally came upon three homeless men. As was our plan, we all stopped, got out, opened the hatches, and started offering our bags.

"Would you like a Christmas bag?" was our greeting. "Merry Christmas! Here's a gift for you," was yet another. While I was not fearful of the close encounter with these dirty, battered, forlorn-looking men, I did wonder what our students were thinking. Looking over at Colton, Katelyn, and Elizabeth delivering these packs of clothing and food, I was pleased to see the look of concern, and the love of Christ as they lovingly doled out our gifts.

That first stop garnered only three men. Back into our vehicles, back through some pretty rough neighborhoods, we continued in our search for the homeless. As we drove, the parent related how she and her family come out as a family on Christmas Day, bringing backpacks they themselves had filled, distributing their gifts to the homeless. As we approached a vacant corner lot, she excitedly remarked, “It's usually in this area that we hit the jackpot."

I FROZE IN MY WARM FUZZY THOUGHTS AND FEELINGS OF PEACE AND GOODWILL TO ALL.

"What?" I thought. "The jackpot? It this what we are about? Hitting a jackpot???" I couldn't believe what I was hearing. Her casual remark struck me as rather callous and unfeeling, yet here she was, with her daughter, out on the first morning of their Christmas holidays, sharing in this labor of love. Playing her comment again in my head, I tried once more to understand her meaning. While I did not gain any more understanding of the comment, it did answer my question of how she knew where to go and what to do.

We arrived at out next stop -- in a large parking lot right across the street from Broadway Baptist Church. All four vehicles stopped, everyone got out, and once again the hatches were opened. At first no one approached us. Several of the adults in our little group picked up packs and started walking toward some of the people who were standing around the parking lot. Within a few minutes, more homeless folk seemed to pour out from thin air. And they weren't just walking toward us -- they were running! It broke my heart to think that they might be worrying that we would leave. It was on that parking lot that we gave out close to 50 of our gifts. Many "Merry Christmases" were exchanged, hands met with warm handshakes, and the receivers of our gifts, with heads bowed low, softly thanked us for our kindness and thoughtfulness. It was quite a humbling experience for me. And I was simply amazed to learn that this was "how it worked": people came with bags, the homeless approached, and gifts were distributed -- as if everyone knew their assigned part in this strange-to-me one-act play. In the current vernacular, I was really trying to wrap my head around this happening.

After only an hour, we had a few more bags to distribute. Driving a mere 3 blocks from the church on a small street that could hardly even be called a “street“ -- it was more of an alley -- we found other of the homeless sitting on a broken down brick wall. These folk were eager to approach us, as if they knew what we had come to do. Once again, everyone knew his part and played it as before.

"Merry Christmas! Would you like a Christmas gift?" "God bless you -- please accept our gift." And so forth. We were nearing the bottom of our pile of gifts, and I was praying hard that we'd have just enough. Not one single bag left over, but just enough for everyone who came to our huddle of vehicles.

Unfortunately, it was not to work out so neatly and evenly. We had to turn away around ten men. Yet, if we’d had a thousand bags, we’d have given out every single one of them. These ten men would not receive the tangible gifts we’d brought to them. And while the spiritual gift of prayer is not to be underestimated, you can’t eat a prayer; you cannot tuck your cold hands into a prayer. Again, I experienced the heart-breaking ache for these cold unfortunates.

I walked over to our Principal, who had come with her husband to help deliver our gifts. “This is both heart-warming and heart-breaking all at the same time,” I said. “I know,” she observed, and then continued, “And with the resources we have (our country’s resources), this should not be happening.” I mentioned the current war situation and all the money that was being sucked up for that hopeless cause. “Why couldn’t we use that money for the homeless?” “Exactly my thoughts,” she responded. Shame, shame, and more shame on our government's administration and on anyone who continues to say that life is sacred, yet does nothing to help some of the most vulnerable of our society. It is in the New Testament that Jesus remarks that the homeless will always be with us, but He also says that “...anything you do for the very least of my brethren, you also do unto me...”. (Matthew 25:40)

We had given out all of our Christmas bags, and were beginning to feel the effects of the temperature, which hovered between 35 to 40 degrees. It was time to head back to school where we would all go our separate ways for the remainder of the holidays.

Before closing my story, however, I would like to share the blessings of that day: how much more I received than I gave during this event. I will forever remember the men who eagerly, or perhaps desperately, reached for our Christmas bags; the eyes of one of the men to whom I gave a backpack -- the near tears in his haunting, brown eyes where I saw not only his gratitude, but also the hopelessness of his situation; the woman asleep on the porch of a vacant home, how one of her friends told us of her illness due to walking without shoes in the rain of several days past; how I wish I had thought to give her my own shoes! -- but thankfully, one of our own group went back to do so. God bless you, Chris.

Back in the warmth and comfort of my own home, I continue to realize my many blessings, and give God thanks for providing for my needs. But since that day of gift-giving to the homeless, I find myself wondering. “Where are they today? What are they doing? Where is the man with the brown eyes? Does he have any family? And if so, why isn’t he with them now?” And I continue to try and wrap my head around the plight of these nameless, though no longer to me faceless, people who call the streets of Fort Worth home.

An old proverb goes something like this: “May we not be about giving only at Christmas, but be about the giving of Christmas throughout the year.” We are more acutely aware of those who are less fortunate at Christmas, but do they not have needs year ‘round? We know that they do. May we -- may I -- be ever mindful of this, and seek to give out the blessings of Christmas every day of the year. I know this will be my intent for the New Year ahead.

The Domino Dog

2008-11-18T14:19:00.005-06:00

He’s a five-pound, long-haired, black and white Chihuahua who thinks he’s a fifty-pound Doberman. Although Domino is one of the smallest of God’s creatures, he has a big heart and a personality to match. Since acquiring Domino in September of 2007, I’ve taught him a couple of “tricks”. One of these tricks is “dancing”. With a tasty training treat in one hand, I coax him up into a hind-leg stance, and watch him go into what looks like spasms. They are really jigs of joy as he “dances” around and around on his tiny hind legs, whirling and twirling, working so hard to earn the coveted treat. Another is our "high five" trick. From a sitting position, and with a training treat nearby, I excitedly command, "High five! High five!", at which time he leaps up with his two paws matching my two palms in a gesture of love and solidarity. If you ever see Domino and me, ask us about this special trick! It's hilarious.

Domino has beautiful, symmetrical markings. While he is almost all black, he sports four white, tiny paws, and a white chest and belly. The white hair around his neck reminds me of a bow-tie – it’s just that symmetrical! His large, brown eyes sometimes look almost human, and he often gets away with his pranks because of those lovely eyes. Domino’s tail is large and bushy, and can often be seen wagging in pure delight of just being with his mistress.

His personality is just as charming. He is mostly a docile dog, but he gets excited in the mornings when he wakes up and again when I arrive home from work. He scampers around, belly on the floor, tail wagging ninety miles a minute, happy to see me, ready to play and perform his tricks.

Domino’s favorite activity – if it can be called an “activity” – is to lie in my lap in the recliner of my bedroom. There he is perfectly contented to lie in the crook of my knees while I read, watch TV, or nap. Often we cuddle and have what I call a “love fest”. I rub, rub, rub his little perfectly rounded head; his white chest and belly; and then finally behind his soft, fluffy black ears. I think he likes those love fests better than eating! He is a very special dog, and not just because he’s mine, but because he is one of God’s creation.

Fall in Haiku

2008-11-11T11:56:00.005-06:00

Stirrings of crisp air
refreshes mind and body
sun’s warm rays delight.

Leaves of brilliant hues
glimmering gold and crimson
the glory of fall.

Pumpkins and turkeys
fragrant autumnal spices
bring their gifts of fall.

Trees in bare glory
sing in twig language their song
splendor comes in fall.

Significant & Formative Events in My Life (so far!)

2008-11-05T12:32:00.007-06:00

1977 Meeting Tim, my husband-to-be, at Southwestern University

1979 Graduation from Southwestern University (B.M.)

1980 My marriage to Tim

1981 Moving to Rochester, NY for Tim to attend graduate school (some very difficult and unhappy years for me)

1985 Moving back to Texas for me to attend graduate school (TCU)

1987 Graduation from Texas Christian University (M.M.)

1988 My Dad dies at the age of 61

1989 Buying our first home (still there after almost 19 years!)

1992 Graduation from UNT (M.L.S.)

1993 My Mom dies at the age of 55

1997 Starting first school library job

1999 Tim is diagnosed with Hodgkin’s Lymphoma

2004 Last vacation with Tim to San Francisco (what fun!)

2005 Tim dies of Hodgkin’s Lymphoma after a struggle of 5 years

2007 Taking an Alaskan cruise with friend, Sandy (a trip of a lifetime!)

2007 My sister being diagnosed with breast cancer

2007 Taking an interim job as a church pianist

2007 Becoming a pet Mommy to Domino

2007 Taking the interim job as pianist as a permanent position
2008 Joining this church as a member

2008-11-05T09:19:00.002-06:00

Dear Gentle Readers:

If you've been reading my blog, you will have noticed that it was rather dated. Today I am turning the proverbial new leaf and reorganizing and updating my blog. You will see some of the old posts, but also new things will start appearing. A lot has happened since the last post in late February 2008, so please check back for the latest.

Welcome to My World,
Belinda

Head Time (Or My Head’s Not for Rent)

2008-02-15T08:43:00.002-06:00

We live in a noisy society. Or had you noticed? Try sitting in your living room without the overt sounds of a radio, TV, computer buzz, or the like, and just listen. I’ll bet you can still identify at least three distinct sounds. Those sounds might be the refrigerator, the washer/dryer, or even the distant sounds of an airplane overhead. Maybe it’s the sound of your own breathing or that of your near companion. You might even hear the crickets on your patio. My point is that even when we think we’re in a silent mode, we’re really not.

Right from the get-go I will say that I love silence. I NEED silence as much as I need oxygen, food, and water. I need quiet time (henceforth to be called QT) to sort out things in my head. Sometimes I do not sort. I just sit. I simply am. And it seems that the older I get, the more I need large quantities of my quiet or head time. The consequences of not getting this QT are real and severe.

My job – while enjoyable and rewarding – is also quite challenging on any given day. I am a librarian who works diligently every day to meet the academic and informational needs of the school community. Now while this is not physical work, it is highly demanding intellectually. The constant flow of patrons in the Library, each with a different need, requires quick thinking and multi-tasking, not to mention a high degree of knowledge for “where to look” for the required piece of information. It also requires technical knowledge of computers – hardware and software – as well as the ability to search various databases using the most efficient of search techniques and strategies. No, it’s not like digging ditches, but I am mentally exhausted at the end of the day. I’ve definitely given my employer (the school community) the best eight hours of my day.

That being said, silence is imperative at the end of a work day. The silence helps to replenish me; helps me to regroup for the next day; in essence, the silence fills me up so that I am able to pour out the next day. As you can see, silence and QT are not really options for me. They are a necessary part of my work life. It’s also essential for the artistic (music) side of me. Silence provides me an opportunity to reflect, to create, to grow in my artistry. Without silence, art is not made.

I’m happy to report that I almost always get that quiet time. Since I now live without human companionship – having lost my precious husband almost four years ago – I am more able to control the environment of my home. It’s not that my husband was noisy. In fact, he was a quieter person than I and also needed his quiet time. It’s just that I can now know with exact certainty that the house will be mine and mine alone.

Of course, there is Domino. You may have read about him in a prior post. If not, please go back in time and read about this amazing little creature. Fortunately, Domino is not a yapper/barker/noise maker. He serves as an excellent watchdog, or as I proclaimed him recently, Head of Household Security, a job he takes quite seriously and performs amazingly well. When on duty and as warranted, I get a sample of his barking skills. But other than barking as part of his job, he is a quiet, docile little dog who’d rather sit quietly in my lap with me while watching TV, reading, or napping than bark up a storm for no apparent reason. Domino, it would seem, also needs his fair share of quiet time. That’s something we have in common.

And so it can be said that I am able to control the noise level in my home and can get as much silence and QT as I need on a regular basis – that being on a DAILY basis. As previously mentioned, not getting this QT has negative consequences for me: I lose focus throughout the day; I am cranky; my patience is paper thin; and I feel bad physically. I may get a headache; start to get body aches; in general, I start to feel sick. My head also feels like it has a pile of trash in it – trash that needs to be taken OUT but stays IN because of not getting that QT.

I believe that a lot of people have trouble with QT. They’re not comfortable with their own thoughts. They need constant stimulus (noise, eating, fidgeting, etc.) so as to possibly avoid their own thoughts. Perhaps this is why so many people flip on the stereo, kick up the iPod, and tune in to Sirius – to avoid being alone with their thoughts – or perhaps alone with no thoughts. And I do think that some people don’t have nay thoughts. Nothing to sort out. Nothing of consequence to think about. Like, “Nobody’s home.”

Or maybe it’s because we are a society constantly “on the go”. We have forgotten how to be quiet. We have forgotten how to be still. With busy family schedules, it seems there’s always something to do. (And don’t get me started on the troubling fact that kids are way over scheduled these days – that’s yet another post.) It leaves very little time for those simple pleasures – one of which I call my QT.

Whether it’s due to self-imposed noise, or the lack of time for oneself, I believe that we, as a society, will one day pay for this lack of silence, solitude. And the price may be as real and severe as mine are.

Can you hear me America – over all of the noise?